Jesus In My Blackness

Jesus In My Blackness
By L. A. Jackson

It rings through my soul
You are a Black Man
With Black Dreams
Dreams that will never be
Dreams that you should
Never expect to see


I try and I try
But nowhere is my
Landing place
So I try in My Blackness
To carry the load
The weight of it all
It is too much to carry
The White Man doesn’t believe in me
I am of the the Black Man, but
The Black Man doesn’t’ believe in me
The White woman  doesn’t believe in me
The Black woman is of me, but
The Black woman doesn’t believe in me
How do I escape this pain
I see no way out
I am trapped in a place that seems like Hell
What should I do
Where should I turn
The spirituals are calling me
But my ears are deaf and
My mouth is mute with pain
I want to reach out but can’t find my place
This is over taking me
And I feel out of control
Who do I trust
Who do I reach out to
I don’t know
But the spirituals are calling me
So I decide to answer them
See what they mean by this calling
Why are they so persistent
No one else is
So I asked them
Why do you call me this way
What do you want from me
I am nothing nor no one
But they spoke and said
We Love you…………
What do you mean
You love me
I am a Black Man
With a Black Dream
How can you love
When so Many of them
Hate me?
But they spoke and said
We Love you…………
What do you mean
You Love me
I am the misunderstood
The taken for granted
I am the fruit that hangs for the tree
Violence against me separates me from my inners
They say I am nothing
But they spoke and said
We Love you…………
Why do you continue to say this
I said
The mere site of My Blackness causes HATE
I go to church and I see
You painted in white
They say color doesn’t matter
But they know it does
They say just focus on Jesus
And everything will be OK
But even some of them
Hate the color of my skin
How could You love me
This time, only one of them spoke
And He said
I Love you
I asked Him who He was
And He said
I am the way, the life, and the truth
I asked
How could you Love me
I am a Black Man
With Black Dreams
He said
I created you and your Dreams
I Love your skin
I said
Even in my Blackness
And he said, I created your Blackness
Changed forever I now am
He overflowed me with His Love
Said that He would dwell within me
Said that He would never leave me
Said He would not forsake me
He showed me a purpose for my existence
I owe Him payment I cannot afford
Therefore I have decided
That this Black Man
With these Black Dreams
Will stand up and be heard
I will shout from the mountains
I will let my gift be seen
I will behold his presence
I will be strong in spite of HATE.
I will trust the Lord to keep me
Even when they hate my Blackness
When they sit and try to bring my demise
I will laugh at them
Because His power surpasses them all
His death and resurrection
Are truly for the whosoever
Even a Black Man
With Black Dreams.

© 2010 L. A. Jackson